I thought the greyness of today’s sky shot with blue was an apt metaphor for life. There is always a blue patch in our bad days. We just have to look for it. Greyness soon passes and we do not have to hold on to the memory of our grey days otherwise we miss the clear blue days.
I am snatching quietness at a cemetery which is full of life. There is a deer and a flock of turkeys rooting amongst the graves for whatever turkeys eat. Maybe grass or seed. I wrap myself in peacefulness after the busyness of the day. The wind blows strongly around me and I see the life thriving in a place of endings and this too, is life. Endings are also beginnings if we only change our thinking.
I still think of you, you know
when the snows of a thousand winters frozen by melts softly into springs many springs pass now many times the trees have leafed out and reached out
and I am taken by breezes and sunbeams into years ago when
when you were that shy and thoughtful boy I talked for hours with on any conceivable subject in that Burger King in Florida
and sometimes we even laughed.
I took you at face value
I knew nothing of masks then. There was just you and your sweetness and quietness I liked and sought
there was nothing in me warning me to question you no red flags unfurled and years flipped by at the speed of a paper calendar hurricane with the power to make us age and experience and learn about the power of futility
How differently things turned out than I thought they would–
the boy with the shy smile and
how he seemed to like me and I him and we were friends we talked nonstop on telephones with cords spanning years and years before
became complicated and arduous and we had to be adults in a world in which we never grew up in
we don’t know how.
and I smile a little
Disillusionment by Abigail Larson